Unexpectedly you came. Indifferent and clueless but you had the aura of complexity. I didn’t bother to recognize the beauty that was innate in you for it was just one of those senseless conversations for me. We were both minding our own pointless existence. As the witty exchange of words drew us together, it suddenly occurred to me that this was different. You were different. I instantly noticed how amazingly smart you were. That and more.
I was the black pawn. You were the white knight. We were always on the same board but we never had our squares aligned. While
I was busy protecting, shielding my own realm, you were having your own share of victorious moments. I took my steps one square at a time, constantly being aware of the threat that haunted me for years. Your valor radiated from within while your horse galloped. Your mere presence was too overwhelming for me not to notice.
You were my metaphor.
Your vagueness was intriguing me.
For some strange reason it was as if I understood every crap you’ve been telling me. I just refused to acknowledge the fact that they were affecting me this much. I was trying desperately hard to resist being dragged any further into this but the scent of paranoia that once lingered in my whole being seemed to have faded.
It had its toll.
You had me.
We both knew that we could not justify the mediocrity of it all. You once told me that caring for someone over SMS was hypocrisy. Still you said you meant those words that you blurted out that one midnight when I was about to hit the sack. How ironic. I had doubts about its sincerity, though. I told you that. You didn’t argue. You just understood.
I was confused that’s why I just had to draw the line. I didn’t want to hold on to something that was not even there. You assured me that it was there, constantly hovering over my open palm. Somehow I just couldn’t grasp it. Maybe because I was just trying hard to get a grip of it for I feared that it might go away. I realized that I wasn’t letting it have a chance to calmly rest on my palm. I know you were just taking your time. You’ve been doing that from the start. You would never know how much I appreciated you for that. You were just probably as scared as I was. Not even half I bet, for now you have everything to lose.
I’m nearing the end of the chessboard. Soon I’ll be transformed into a queen. I don’t know how to rule. This whole sense of sovereignty and royalty is far too profound for me to comprehend.
Give me reasons to trust you.
Tell me you’ll guard me with all your heart.
Tell me you’ll erase the fear that I’ve been having of falling in love.
Assure me that you’ve the one I’ve been longing for and I’ll forever be yours.
Written by paperclip, edited by blue_kuko and first appeared on www.peyups.com on 28th October 2004.